Wednesday, April 17, 2013

intentional parenting & other random stuff

There are so many things about my husband that I'm thankful for, but one that immediately comes to mind is that we're on the same page when it comes to parenting.  I hear stories all the time of wives and husbands approaching parenting from very different perspectives and things don't usually end well if that's the case.

One thing that we believe strongly in is intentional parenting.  Both of us are convinced that the only way to truly disciple and train your children is to be active, involved and intentional with their little lives.



For example, we don't want to just pray for compassionate children, we want to involve them in situations to help develop that.  We don't want to just "hope" that our children will be courageous, we want to actively seek opportunities for them to develop courage.  We don't just wish for the kiddos to be responsible, we are trying to create an atmosphere where they are becoming responsible.  And that's one of the reasons they have chores...

I wanted an easy, but somewhat attractive chore chart for the kiddos that would also double as a way for them to keep up with their "TV time" chips.  {I'll explain that later...}

So here's what we've got...



Their chores are typed out on the brown paper.  I did it this way so I could easily change them if needed...


The black square at the top is actually a chalkboard and is home to the "up for hire" chores.  Here's our take on chores/allowance/money and things like that...

The girls (& one day Sam) have certain chores that they are responsible for.  Some are daily (making their bed, putting away clothes, unpacking their lunchbox...) and some are weekly (dusting, helping with the dishes, vacuuming...).  They do not get paid for doing chores.  These are just responsibilities that are expected of them because they are part of the family and we all have roles to play to make this house function smoothly.  We do, however, give them a weekly allowance.  We do this to help them learn to be good stewards of money.  As the old saying goes, we're teaching them to spend some, save some and give some.   We never associate the allowance with doing chores.  For us, these are totally separate things. 

So back to the "up for hire" board...

From time to time, I'll have certain projects  to do that are not a part of their assigned chores.  This may be as simple as sorting lonely socks, cleaning out the car or dusting the baseboards in the house.  I will offer these things with pay attached or they can earn more TV time for doing them.  The things that show up on the chalkboard are purely optional!  Sometimes they jump on the chance to earn a little more money and TV and sometimes they pass!


Ok, the TV time chips...


Each Monday, the girls start out with 8 chips with each one representing 30 minutes of TV time.  This comes out to a 30 minute show per day with some extra time for the weekend (or whenever).  Each time they watch a show or movie, they take a chip (or two depending on the length of the show) out of their jar (each girl has her own) and drop it in the middle jar.  Once the chips are gone, they're gone for the week and they have to wait until Monday for the time to start over.  

There are exceptions - our family movie nights don't count towards that, sick days spent on the couch don't count, TV watched other places doesn't, etc.  We are not rigid and legalistic about it, but did want a guide for them because Lee and I both feel like time in front of the TV should be limited.  We also wanted a less subjective and a more concrete approach to determining what was "too much TV."  Using the chips leaves little room for debate!  The girls have spent more time playing outside and playing with those forgotten toys because of this.  This has also helped them gain a better understanding of using their time (aka chips) wisely!!  

We realize that what works for our family doesn't work for every house...

Again, we are just trying to parent these precious gifts intentionally!!

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And other random stuff...

my Ellee girl lost a front tooth...

and we enjoyed a fun Color Run weekend in Nashville with some great friends...





Happy Spring...finally!! :)