beautiful chaos

Well, first let's play "catch up" with some pictures.  Since the last post (sheesh...it was May!) we have...

• finished up a year of school...

{Ellee's Honors Day - May 2014} 

{Addie's Honors Day - May 2014}

{Sam sitting through one of the Honors Day.  I mean really, no one can convince me that this child is not the most adorable!!}

:: Blessed Mamma...my precious kiddos received a TON of awards on Honors Day.  Thankful. ::

• enjoyed summer...

 {Annual Gatlinburg trip.  The cousins.}

{Enjoyed a weekend visit with one of our favorite families.}

• started another year of school...

• and GOT OUR REFERRAL!!!

On Thursday, July 10th, I received one of the most exciting phone calls.  Our adoption agency called around 9 am that morning with the kind of news that makes your heart skip a beat and time freeze.

WE. HAD. A. SON.

Our social worker didn't give me many details; everything I would want to know would follow in an email.  Ok, let's be honest, 'everything I would want to know' is a far cry from the truth.  The email would simply contain all the details that were available.  My girls, being more in tune with the adoption process than the average 8 & 10 year old, knew from my end of the phone call what was going on.  By the time my quivering hand ended the call, the kids were squealing and bouncing off the walls!  I quickly called Lee and told him he had to get home...now!  As hard as it was, I promised not to look at my email until we were all together.  

{The kids were anxiously waiting for Daddy so we could open our email!}

When Lee finally got home (those 10 minutes felt like hours!!) we opened the email and stared into the face of the most precious little China doll on the face of the planet.  Our son.  Those cheeks.  Those beautiful brown eyes.  Those hands.  My baby.  My child.  My heart.

We were all totally and unconditionally in love with the face that stared back.  You are "warned" during the adoption process to not get emotionally caught up in the face and the pictures until you review all the paperwork and have a physician review their medical records.  But come on, look at him!!  How could we not?!?

We did, however, follow all the proper protocol and had his file thoroughly reviewed and spent time praying through the information we received.  It didn't take much time though to officially accept the referral and claim this beautiful child as our own!!   All praise be to God!

So the months since then have been filled with paperwork, more paperwork and even more paperwork.  It is really insane the amount of paperwork that surrounds adoption. Sheesh.

We've since then been given updates on our Elijah along with more pictures...

We even celebrated his birthday in July!  He turned 2!  Per the girls' request, they were in charge of the party...

So the million dollar question that we get asked, almost daily, is...When will we get him?

Well, praise the Lord, we are nearly at the end of the process (!!!!!) and are told it will probably be the end of December, maybe early January.

We were able to send a care package to him recently!  It included several "suggested" items from our agency - an outfit, a blanket, a small stuffed animal, a picture book and disposable cameras.

We washed all the fabric items and let them sit in our house for several weeks before sending the items in hopes that our "smell" will get to Elijah.  Far fetched?? Maybe.  But this was suggested to us by several other families so it's definitely worth a try!

We also bought an identical blanket and stuffed monkey to keep here and take with us to China when we travel.  The hope is that he'll recognize the items we have and make some sort of connection with us.  Again, it may seem far fetched, but we want to do our part in doing whatever we can to help the transition for our baby boy.

I think the most exciting part of Elijah's care package was the picture book I made for him!  I put together a very simple and easy fabric picture book for him to have so he can begin getting familiar with our faces.

I prayed and cried and pleaded with the Lord over each item I placed in the box.  I desperately want our faces and our smells to somehow be etched into my baby's mind and into his heart.  I truly trust that the sovereign Creator of the universe can make that happen.  Would you please begin praying that with us?

******************************************

I believe that brings us up to date for now!  I am thankful that the next few months are very full with holidays, celebrations, birthdays and other exciting dates so that time passes quickly!  We are all beyond ready to have Elijah home and have a house full of chaos - beautiful chaos!!

the most amazing love

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a sucker for a good romantic movie.  Just ask my husband...he's sat through more that he'd like to admit.

But I'm afraid those movies have done us women more harm than we realize.  They have completely and totally distorted how we view true love.

Without realizing it, somewhere in the back of our minds, we've come to think that "true" love must be laced with intense drama, heartbreak, highs, lows, stop-you-at-the-altar-right-before-you-marry-the-mediocre-guy, chase-you-through-Manhatten-on-a-motorcycle, run-through-the-train-station-and-get-down-on-one-knee, over the top kinds of moments!!

Somewhere in the midst of all the Hollywood hype, we've lost appreciation and respect for the quiet, steady, constant love of a man committed to his wife and family.

Over the years, I've been blessed to experience and observe this kind of quiet, committed love in many different ways.

But one story is worth sharing...

It's the love between a man and a woman who married young.  Very young.  She, at the age of 15 kind of young.

Everyone said they'd never make it.  They didn't care.  They loved each other.  

The first time she ever met him, she was standing in a kitchen sink painting.  His first pick up line..."Do you date?"

She told me how he almost didn't make it to their wedding on time because he was fixing his car.  But he did show up and they married on a Sunday afternoon with him in a new suit and she in her new lizard shoes.  

She told me stories of how they'd sit in their house with one light hanging down in the middle of the room, hovered around a radio, listening to the Grand Ole Opry.  

She told me how they would play checkers with a board he had made and bottle caps he had saved.

She told me how they'd go to Fruit Basket Dances at friends' houses.  

She told me how he had only made her mad, I mean really mad, one time.  And how he did everything he could to make it right.

She told me how they had raised 4 children together through good times and bad and had lived to see a slew of grandchildren and great grandchildren. 

He was a man, a quiet man, that was committed to the Lord, his wife and his family.  He worked hard day after day to provide for them.  

He would never make it as the lead man in any movie and would have never graced the cover of any novel.  (He did, however, have such beautiful blue eyes...)  And his slanted, left-handed writing wouldn't have penned any words to be passed down through the ages.

But he had the love of one woman...my grandmother.  His baby.  

I don't think I ever, ever heard him call her by any other name.  She was his baby.

I was blessed to watch her hold his hand when he crossed over from death to life.  As he was being ushered into eternity by his Savior, she was stroking his head.  She never left his side during those days of suffering.  She, suffering herself, stayed beside him.  She wiped his face.  She brushed his hair.  

And even in his most delirious of moments, he would search the room for his Baby.  He wanted her by his side.  And by his side was where she stayed.

I saw in the hospital room that week, day after day, true love.  Real love.  Committed, quiet, last-forever kind of love. 

No, not a love that would make it on the big screen, but an amazing kind of love that runs deep and can't even be parted by death. 

this is it...

I hereby give you our final fundraiser to bring our son home...

Really?!?

YES!!!

We are praising God that He has provided us with a $2,000 matching grant from Lifesong for Orphans.  This means, if we can raise $2,000, they will match it dollar for dollar.  That's $4,000 towards our son's "ransom!"  How amazing!

Part of the agreement with Lifesong is that we (the adoptive family) cannot contribute anything towards our fund.  All of the money has to come from family and friends.  Because of that, we are asking you to donate just $10.00.  Seriously, that's all!  We trust the Lord to provide 200 people to help!  He's been so faithful thus far and we know He'll continue to be.

Many of our family and friends have gone WAY beyond what we could ever ask or imagine in this fundraising adventure, and for that, we are forever thankful.  Honestly, words will never properly describe how truly blessed we have been as we've traveled this road of adoption for the second time.  Saying thank you seems grossly inadequate.  But none the less, thank you.

To help with this final fundraiser, all you have to do in click the "donate" button below.  Your donation is tax-deductible and 100% of the money goes directly towards our adoption.  Lifesong doesn't keep a single penny.

You've heard it said that it takes a village to raise a child.  This may or may not be true, but one thing is for sure...IT TAKES A VILLAGE TO BRING ONE HOME!  Thank you for being a part of our village!

adoption questions answered

Several posts ago, I said I'd answer "those" questions when I was feeling brave.

Well I don't know that "brave" is what I'm feeling, but here we go...

I'm going to answer and address the two most popular questions and criticisms for those of us who are adopting internationally.  But let me offer a disclaimer first...

I am only speaking for myself and my family.  I don't dare claim to be an expert on this topic, nor am I disillusioned enough to think I represent everyone who has ever adopted.

1.  Why would you adopt a child from another country when there are so many here in the United States that need adopting?

Hmm....  Well, this is by far the greatest criticism we receive when we share with others that we're adopting internationally.  Sometimes people will ask us this directly, but it usually comes in the form of a sideways question but you know exactly what they're implying.  So...let me do my best to answer this for us.  

• We are fully convicted that the Gospel eliminates country boundaries.  There is no "ours" and "theirs."  ALL are made in the imagine of God and all were declared very good by our Creator.  (Genesis 1)
• We believe that God calls the Christian to care for orphans here in the US and in every single country on the map.
• Do we support domestic adoption?  Absolutely. 110%.  Without any hesitation at all...we support families who adopt from our great country! YES! YES!
• We don't believe, however, that one "type" of adoption (domestic or international) trumps the other.  All are orphans.  All are to be cared for.
• So why are we adopting (again!) from another country?  I don't have a very profound answer.  God has just given us a burden for those in orphanages in other countries.  Many years ago He started breaking our hearts for the babies and children in those conditions and has led us in that direction.  It's really not any more complex than that.  
• Conclusion:  We are Christ followers first, American second.  Where He leads, we follow.    

2.  If you can't afford to adopt, why would you?  Why are you asking others to pay for your adoption?

Ah... the money question...

• Let me first assure the skeptics out there...we are not sitting around on our duff hoping someone drops money in our lap!  We have made some major changes and cuts to our budget, have taken on odd jobs here and there, are using our savings, and doing EVERY. SINGLE. THING. WE. CAN. to pay for this ourselves!  So please be assured that we are working hard to that end!
• International adoption can cost anywhere from $25,000 to $40,000.  Yes, it's crazy ridiculous.  Yes, there is a lot of red tape and bureaucracy and (in our opinion) unnecessary costs involved.  Yes, it makes us sick that it cost that much to give a child a forever home.  But, as my Daddy would say, it is what it is.   You can't turn a deaf ear or blind eye to the millions of orphans all over the world just because you don't support the process.  At least we can't.  
• We stand by something we've shared before and will continue to share...ADOPTION IS NOT JUST FOR THE WEALTHY, IT'S FOR THE CALLED.  Aren't you thankful that those with an extra $30,000 sitting around aren't the only ones adopting?!?  If that were the case, can you imagine how much more sickening the already devastating orphan crisis would be??  
• Those who are followers of Christ are part of a larger picture.  Part of a body to be exact (1 Corinthians).  So there are times when the Lord calls someone to a task and the body should joyfully come alongside them for support.  Not always, but sometimes that support is financial.  Hmm... that always stirs up a certain amount of controversy...  

Well, I think that about covers it!  Of course there are many other concerns and criticisms, but those seem to be the most popular.  My desire in writing this was to simply shed some light on our convictions and our hearts' desire. 

Our prayer is that through this process, but more importantly through our life, God will receive all the praise and glory that He is due.  

**I'd love to hear your thoughts, concerns or feedback on this.  I think.  Maybe.  My skin isn't very thick, so maybe only nice thoughts.  :) **

t-shirt time!!

We are so excited about our next fund-raising effort for our adoption!!

::T-SHIRT TIME::

Who doesn't love a good t-shirt?! It's always fun to wear a t-shirt that's an original and catches the attention of on-lookers! We have designed a t-shirt that does just that! And the best part of all...when you buy a shirt, you will be helping make one less orphan in this world!!

Every single penny that is made from the sale of the shirts will go directly towards bringing our Elijah home!!

We ask that you please consider buying a shirt...or two...or three!! We would LOVE for you to share this with anyone and everyone you know!

When we sold t-shirts for Sam's adoption, it was so incredible to run into strangers wearing our shirts - so please SHARE THIS WITH EVERYONE!!  

So here they are...

{front}

{back}

*The front says "three million minus ONE" under the silhouette of China.  The wording is in reference to the (approximate) number of orphans in the world which most reports say 3 million.  Mind blowing - that's 3 million faces, 3 million children, 3 MILLION... 

*The back says "...and I helped..."  Because you will help make "one less" by buying a shirt!!

*The shirts are red with gray lettering.

**You DON'T have to have a paypal account to buy...you can use a credit or debit card!

**Please let me know if you have any questions or problems ordering!!

**If you need your shirt(s) shipped - please add the $5.00 shipping from the drop-down menu.  The $5.00 shipping is PER ORDER, not PER SHIRT, so only add it ONCE - even if you're ordering more than one!**

::THANK YOU::

Adult Sizes

Adult S $15.00 USD Adult M $15.00 USD Adult L $15.00 USD Adult XL $15.00 USD Adult XXL $16.50 USD Adult XXXL $17.50 USD Shipping $5.00 USD

Children/Youth Sizes

Youth XS (2-4) $15.00 USD Youth S (6-8) $15.00 USD Youth M (10-12) $15.00 USD Youth L (14-16) $15.00 USD Shipping $5.00 USD

grieving a loss...

She came into our living room last night, clearly shaken, overwhelmed, confused and struggling...

"Baby, what's wrong?  What's got you so upset?"

My precious 10 year old had questions about certain "words" and "phrases" and "situations."

Yep... those words, those phrases, and those situations.

Apparently some kids at school were discussing certain topics that my 10 year old was completely oblivious to. And believe me, her naivety was very intentional on her Dad and Mom's behalf!

We are very, very careful about what our kiddos watch, listen to, see on the internet and who they spend time with.  It's not by mistake that I've been labeled a helicopter parent - ya know, one that hovers over her children!

So there are certain topics and words that we have not introduced to our oldest yet because we felt she wasn't ready.  She's only 10 for crying out loud!!

So you can imagine the furry that welled up inside me when some kid at school decided she was ready...

There's no need for detail, but praise GOD, she wasn't too scarred or confused by what she heard.  She just had questions and we did our best to answer them in a way that we felt was appropriate without confusing her more but bringing peace to her little mind.

I knew the day was coming, but we, her parents, planned to be the initiator of those conversations.

And what I'm grieving is the loss of my little girl.

As she was talking, this is what I saw...

...my precious, blue-eyed, naive little baby.  My first-born. 

And it feels like I lost that last night.  

Her eyes have been opened to things that are only for those leaving child-hood and entering into the next season of life.  She now has questions and burdens that are not associated with being a little girl...

And it grieves me to my core.

I know this transition is normal, natural and even praise-worthy!  But it still hurts.

And it brings up a constant struggle we have of finding balance for our kids...

You see, as parents who are committed to raising your children in a way that honors God and the truth of His word, it's always hard to know how much your children should be exposed to.  Some use this struggle to justify their choice for public school, private school and homeschool.  It's a big deal...

And I've got to be perfectly honest here....If I could, I would move my family to a house on a mountain and only come down a few times a year for food.  I would isolate us from the rest of the world and live in a happy, safe Brown Family Bubble!

But we all know that's not reality.  And...it makes us completely useless for advancing the gospel...which is our purpose as Christians, right?!

So since my bubble theory doesn't seem to pan out, I cling to something a very wise lady once told me...

You can't isolate your children from the world, so you insulate them with the Word of God.

Face it parent, your children are going to be exposed to sin and corruption (although I understand the desire for that exposure to be on your terms. Believe me, I do!) so the only peace we can have, as parents, is to make sure they are fully insulated with the truth found in scripture.

Teach it to your kids.

Study it with your kids.

Memorize it with your kids.

And live it out in front of your kids.

After my baby went to bed last night, I looked at Lee and said, "What do we do?"

Praise the Lord for my amazing, godly husband who is my voice of wisdom when emotions have the best of me. (See, I was ready to call the school this morning and tell them she'd never be back. Ever. I even looked into homeschool for college.)

He looked at me and simply said, "We redeem it."

Wow.

We use the beauty of God's Word to teach our babies how God can make right what the world has made wrong.

We use the beauty of God's Word to show our babies how God intended things to be and how we, as Christians, fight to redeem that in a lost and fallen world.  

updates, a name & a story about poop

Are you sick and tired of hearing us talk about raising money for the adoption?

Are you rolling your eyes at yet another "fundraising" post?

Yeah, me too!

I promise you my friend, I'm more weary of this "adoption fund raising" than you are.  Trust me.

Here are the facts:

1.  God has given my family a huge and unexplainable (apart from Him) burden for orphans.

2.  God has called Lee to be a pastor and me, a stay-at-home mom.  You do the math on income! :)

3.  The perfect scenario would be for us to have an extra, oh say, $30,000 sitting around so we could completely fund it ourselves.

And here is our prayer:

*That other Christians will heed the command of scripture to care for orphans.  For the Believer, it's not a suggestion, it's a command.  We are the ones to carry the burden for the fatherless.  Not everyone is called to actually adopt, but all Christians are called to do something.  So our prayer is that others will carry the burden with us through finances and prayer.   

So here's an update on where we are with the envelope fundraiser...

The Lord has blessed us in a huge way!!  I cannot begin to tell you how thankful we are for all of you who have claimed an envelope.  We've had 78 of the 150 claimed and that is amazing.  Many of you have taken more than one envelope and others have donated more than what was asked.  It's truly been humbling to see.  

There are still some envelopes out there that have been claimed but haven't been returned, so I can't give you a total yet.  I do know it's over $5,000 and that blows my mind!!

Click here to see details of the fundraiser.  Basically, we're asking you to claim a numbered envelope and then donate the coordinating number.  The numbers are 1-150 so you're guaranteed to not be obligated beyond 150.  Actually, it's lower than that because many have asked for the highest one available.  

We are praying for at least 100 to be claimed so that's just about 22 more!!  Please prayerfully consider claiming one!!

So onto an adoption update:

We will have our home study complete by the 2nd week of December which is a huge relief!  From then, we'll begin working on our dossier.  I'm told this is even more intense than a home study.  I don't know how that's possible, but we'll see!!  (Korea doesn't require one so we didn't experience that with Sam.)

At this point, we're still not sure of a timeline, but here are some things we "know."  (I say "know" because you feel like you never really know anything on this journey!)

*Once all of our paperwork arrives in China (which will probably still be a few months) we'll be waiting 1-5 months for a referral.

*After our referral, we'll be looking at 3-4 months (I think!) until we travel to get him.

*So if you do a little calculation, we'll maybe-possibly-who-really-knows bring our son home at the end of next summer.

And the sweet munchkin already has a name...

Elijah Raith Brown

I get chills seeing it typed out.  I just can not wait to have my quiver full and have my Elijah home in my arms!  Please Lord.

So onto poop...

Really?  Yes.

I must share this story because it's one of my favorites! 

Lee & I began noticing that Sam would not eat brown M & M's.  Just wouldn't do it.  (We used them as treats when he was potty-training.)

He would rather walk away and have none than put a brown one in his mouth.  

This continued for a while and we were completely puzzled by it!

While talking about this one day in front of Ellee, she sheepishly grinned and said...

"I just may have told him that they were poopy..."

That Ellee.  If you know her, then you can see her saying it.  She is truly one of a kind.  Somehow she has her brother fully convinced that brown M & M's are poop.  

We've tried everything to convince him otherwise but he's not buying it.  I gave him a handful yesterday and he ate every one except the brown ones and he threw those in the trash.  

Silly, silly kids.  

And I pray soon that we'll have one more silly kid to add to the bunch!!